Real Life by Brandon Taylor

"How strange it is to be a bird, Wallace thinks. To have the world beneath you, the inversion of scale, what is small becoming large, what is large becoming small, the way a bird can move where it wants in space, no dimension unconquerable" (90).

The word that comes to mind when describing this book is "honest." So painfully and beautifully honest that you can't put it down. Real Life follows introverted and queer Wallace through one summer weekend at a Midwestern university where he studies biochemistry. In an effort to combat both his depression and the built-in exclusion that comes with being the only Black student in the program, he pushes away newfound friendship and throws himself into his work. His struggles only worsen after Wallace’s father passes, unearthing demons that still haunt him from a childhood blemished by multiple instances of sexual abuse.

This painful but necessary undertaking of describing his superincumbent pain to others is not unlike his research process in the lab; Walter must dissect living things, essentially sacrificing them and inflicting pain, for the purpose of gaining a deeper understanding. When Wallace details the contamination that has ruined his arduous, year-long experiment, he describes the problem as an “invisible calamity” and that the mold has left the nematodes with “vacancies in the body cavities” (68). This is Wallace’s interpretation of how his depression makes him feel, as though a piece of him is missing after having been eaten away. Everything changes when Wallace manages to crack open the fragile exterior of his once-nemesis, Miller, exposing long-buried desire and malevolence within his group of friends that allows him to chip away at what “real life” means to him.

This is a complex book dealing with issues of racism, depression, and sexual abuse.